![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
May I present chapter 33. It could have been done Thursday or Friday, but I got sick. There might be a couple of mistakes here and there considering I just typed all of this up and I'm too tired to properly read through it all again.
Anyway, enjoy and leave comments as usual.
title - on the other side
genre - drama/romance
pairing - Zac/OMC
point of view - Zac Hanson
rating - PG-13 (due to some bad language)
betas - I am my own beta. Any and all mistakes are my own. If you happen to tumble across any feel free to inform me so I may correct them, thank you.
info - The fear of the world kept us in, safe from the dirt and the sin and yes I'm terrified, 'cause when you’re out you know there's no return, but I love you and they're going to learn
Previous chapters:
prologue - 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10
11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20
21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30
31 - 32
[ chapter 33 ]
Before I knew it the weeks had flown by and I was on a plane back to Tulsa. It was strange to know I was going to have to spend the next three weeks without Cayden and that I wouldn’t see his parents for a good while either. I’d felt so at home there that the phrase going home didn’t really apply this time, because what home did I have to go to? There was a big difference between having a place to stay and having a home, and staying at Isaac’s definitely didn’t fall into the last category. I really appreciated it, don’t get me wrong, but I had much rather stayed with Cayden another three weeks because the weeks we had spend together had flown by far too quickly, even though we had barely done anything. Mostly we had stayed at home playing videogames, watching movies and making out -among other things. The couple of times we had gone out it had been to the mall, the cinema and to a bar once where I’d met some of Cayden’s friends.
I’d been nervous about meeting them, but I’d been especially nervous about meeting Matthew, Cayden’s first boyfriend and currently his best friend. Cayden had told me that Matthew was a little protective of him, especially after what had happened with Melvin and he wasn’t too sure how he would react to me. I couldn’t particularly blame Matthew for being protective of Cayden, I was just as protective of Kelsey and she of me, so I understood, but that didn’t make me any less nervous.
But, as usual, I shouldn’t have worried, because Matthew and I got along just fine. The start was a bit awkward and there were some rather personal questions, but as the night progressed I found myself completely at ease with all of Cayden’s friends. Most of them didn’t even seem too bothered by our sexuality although one of them would protest heavily when Cayden and I would stand too closely together, but it turned out he only did it to tease us and wasn’t actually bothered by it.
We both had a really good time and by the time we left the bar Cayden was pretty intoxicated and about one beer away from being drunk, which was fine because we had agreed I would drive back so he could drink as much as he wanted as long as he could still remember the way back home, which he did remember, sort of. The ride back took us a good half an hour longer than the ride to the bar had been, which was mostly caused by his loss of attention which resulted in him telling me to turn after and not before the turn was coming up. If this had been anyone other than Cayden I would have probably been annoyed, but this was Cayden and he was just too cute to be frustrated at with the way he was staring out the window, lips curled into a smile while humming random songs.
He was even cuter the next morning. Hung over and all he wouldn’t let me go out of the bed and every time I attempted to, because I sort of needed to pee, he’d pull me back to him and hold me even tighter while burying his face in my neck a bit more and mumbling something about sleeping and staying in bed all day. I would have gladly stayed in bed with him all day but eventually my natural urges took over and I could finally persuade him to let me go long enough to pee and make some coffee and breakfast. We did spend much of the rest of that day in bed because he was being a baby about getting up. I was pretty sure that the hang-over he was having wasn’t any worse than the hang-over he’d had while we were on tour, but the advantage of being home was that you could just stay in bed all day and take advantage of your sober boyfriend when it came to food and cuddling. I’m sure he would have just gotten up and taken his self induced hang-over like a man if I had told him to, but the truth was that I didn’t mind cuddling with him and spoiling him for a change. All along the tour he’d been there for me when things had gotten hard, now it was his turn to be treated to a day of being looked after. Besides, there wasn’t much that topped spending the day in bed with your boyfriend.
I couldn’t keep a smile from creeping up my lips as I thought back of all the amazing moments spend with him and before I knew it the plane touched ground and I hadn’t felt nervous about crashing once, which was a first. I grabbed my carry-on bag and stepped off the plane as soon as the doors opened. I easily made my way through the airport I knew so well and collected my bags at the conveyer belt before walking to the place I had said to meet Kelsey who was skipping her last class to be able to pick me up. She looked beautiful, all smiles, and I wrapped her tightly in my arms, lifting her off the ground in the process. She really was as light as a feather, especially compared to Cayden. She laughed and playfully smacked my chest before hugging me tightly once again.
“You look a lot better.” She said with a pleased smile as she studied my face.
“I told you I was feeling a lot better.”
“I know, but I like to see it with my own two eyes.”
“Only ‘cause I’m so fine and you can’t keep your eyes of me anyway.” I teased.
She gasped and I grinned ducking just in time to avoid being hit in the head with her purse. She glared at me, but a laugh soon spilled from her lips too.
“You just never change, do you?” She asked, shaking her head in mock disappointment.
“Never.” I agreed and took both my suitcase and rolled them in the direction of the exit. She fell into step besides me and guided me back to her car where we ditched the suitcases on the backseats because Kelsey didn’t have much of a trunk. We settled in our seats and she turned on the radio as she drove off the parking lot.
“Is it weird to come back?” She asked after we’d driven in silence for a while.
“Yeah. Usually when you come home you have something familiar to come back to, you know, and now everything is just messed up.”
“Some things do stay the same though.” She said looking at me and I smiled back at her, knowing she meant our friendship.
“Thankfully. I wouldn’t know what to do without you.” I admitted, because in a lot of ways she was still my rock, having Cayden hadn’t really changed that. Of course I could share everything with him too, but there was just something about sharing things with Kelsey that I needed too. Our friendship ran too deep for us to easily replace the other with someone else.
She took my hand and squeezed it softly. “I’m always here.” She said.
“I know you are and that means the world to me.”
“You’d do the same for me.”
“In less than a heartbeat.” I agreed and she smiled, squeezing my hand once more before letting go to shift gears.
I saw a lot more of Kelsey over the next two weeks to catch up on some quality best friend time in between getting ready for the tour. We only had one week left and as usual we were far from ready. Flights and hotels still needed to be confirmed, our equipment needed to be packed and at the same time we were trying to get back in our rhythm when it came to playing together because it had been a while and after a couple of weeks of barely playing a bunch of flaws always crept in and they needed to be straightened out. In between all that we were also trying to spend some much needed time with our friends and family, which was why I was on my way to my parents’ house. They hadn’t invited me. In fact, I still hadn’t talked to them and going by what Isaac had told me I wouldn’t anytime soon if I was going to wait for them to contact me, but I wasn’t on my way there to talk (or fight) with them per se. Long before all of this had gotten so awkward I had promised Mack we’d go see the new James Bond together before our tour would continue and I planned to keep that promise. Mack liked the movies as much as I did and we always watched them together whenever they were on TV. So, I had said I’d take him to see it at the cinema as soon as a new one came out, which had been the case a couple of days ago.
I wasn’t exactly looking forward to seeing my parents again after what had happened between us the last time I’d seen them, but I was here for Mack and not for them so I pushed the nerves and feelings of unease away as well as I could and rang the doorbell.
As I had expected it was my mother who opened the door with a polite smile on her face which faded in an instant when she saw it was me. “What are you doing here?” She asked hostile and it hurt, but I was determined not to let her get to me. I was here for Mack I reminded myself.
“I came to see Mack. I promised him we’d go see the new James Bond together.” I said as normally as I could.
“Ah yes. He mentioned that, but we decided that Walker will take him.” She said and this hurt even more, because it was the first time she’d ever called dad by name in front of me. Usually she would have said your father.
I swallowed away the lump in my throat before trusting myself to speak again. “I promised him that I would take him.” I said again. “Dad doesn’t understand the movies in the least.”
She glared at me for using the word dad, but I wasn’t going to budge. As stupid as they may be acting about the whole thing they were still my parents and for me that would never change.
“Maybe you should have thought of that before you got involved with that nonsense of yours. He’s not going with you and that’s final. I don’t need you to fill his head with your idiocy.” She said with a tone that was so calm it was disturbing.
“I only want to take my little brother to go see a movie. I promise I won’t say a word about my idiocy.” I mocked.
“It’s still not happening. I don’t want you anywhere near this family again, unless you come to your sense and get some help. Goodbye Zachary.” And then she shut the door in my face.
I stared at the door in shock for a good couple of seconds before I came back to my senses and rang the doorbell again, and again when no one answered. Again it seemed like no one was going to answer and I was in the process of inwardly scolding myself for forgetting to bring my key when my mom opened the door again with a frustrated look on her face.
“What?” She demanded.
“He’s my brother. You have no right to tell me I can’t hang out with him. If he doesn’t want to hang out with me anymore, then fine, I’ll accept that, but you don’t have to make that decision for him. All I want to do is take him to the movies like I have promised him. If you don’t want him to know I’m gay–” she recoiled at the word. “–then I won’t say a word about it. Just, please, let my take my brother to the movies.” I pleaded.
“As far as I’m concerned we’re no longer your family and that includes Mackenzie.”
“That’s bullshit.” I objected.
“You made your choice to leave Zac. You can’t expect your actions not to have any consequences. This is one of them and you’ll just have to learn to live with them.” She said still eerily calm. “Now, if you’d be so kind to leave I have other things to tend to.”
I glared at her and didn’t move an inch. “He’s my brother.” I insisted.
“No, he was your brother. You left.”
“You didn’t give me a choice.”
“We did.” She replied.
“Not really.” I said.
“Well, that’s what you think.”
I huffed and we both stood there in silence for a while, neither of us giving in.
“Look, we can keep standing here all day, but you’re not going to see Mackenzie. It’s as simple as that, so you might as well leave.” I didn’t doubt she meant it when I saw the look in her eyes, so I sighed and gave in. I had no other option. Of course I could force my way in, but that would only piss her off more and on top of that I was scared she would somehow punish Mack for it and that was the last thing I wanted. I was sure he already had enough to deal with.
“Fine.” I said unhappily. “But at least tell him that I dropped by and that I didn’t forget about it.”
“Sure.” She said and I instantly didn’t believe it, but instead of making a fuss about it I simply turned and left in defeat. It wasn’t worth the fight. I’d just call him later and explain as much as possible and hope that he wouldn’t hate me.
I drove back to Isaac’s place with pain and disappointment flowing through my mind. I still couldn’t believe they had actually banned me out of their lives; that they wouldn’t even allow me to see my siblings. I guess I shouldn’t have been this surprised, because I knew from Isaac and Taylor that my parents were still unhappy with them for continuing to hang out with me and that they hated that they couldn’t make them do otherwise because Isaac and Taylor were both adults and it seemed to make them twice as determined to keep the younger kids from following their lead. I’d known this, but I suppose a part of me had still hoped that it wouldn’t actually be this bad.
I dropped my keys on the cabinet and shrugged out of my coat as soon as I was inside. I was relieved to find Isaac gone. I didn’t particularly feel like reciting and reliving what had just happened. Instead I made some hot chocolate and plopped on the couch to watch some lame and mind numbing cartoons to fill the time. Isaac was still gone by the time it was time for dinner so I made myself some Mac and Cheese and settled back in front of the TV.
Around seven-thirty I felt I had waited long enough and fished my phone from my pocket to call Jessica. She answered on the third ring with a tired hello.
“Hello to you too. Everything okay?” I asked.
“Zac!” She exclaimed in surprise. “Yeah, fine. Just my English homework kicking my butt.”
“Same old same old huh?” I teased lightly.
“Yeah.” She said with a sigh, she was still distracted.
“I was actually calling to talk to Mack. Is there any chance you can get him on the phone without mom or dad finding out? I don’t want to get you guys in trouble for talking to me.”
“Is this about the movie? He’s been going on about it ever since it came out. He keeps saying you promised to take him and mom and dad keep saying that you probably forgot about it by now and that dad will take him instead.” She said.
“I suppose mom didn’t tell him that I dropped by today and that she wouldn’t let me see him?” I questioned.
“No, she surely forgot to mention that. But I think Mack is in his room so it should be no problem to talk to him.”
“Thanks Jess. I really appreciate it.”
“No problem. Hang on.” She said and then all I heard was a lot of moving around.
“Zac!” Came Mack’s loud enthusiastic voice after a while, immediately followed by Jessica scolding him for making so much noise.
“Hey kid.” I told him with a smile.
“Please tell me you’re still going to take me to the movies because I really really really don’t want to go with dad.” My heart sank a good inch and I had to swallow before I could reply.
“I’m sorry Mack, but they won’t let me take you.” I told him.
“Because of what you and mom and dad are fighting about?” He asked.
“Yeah. I’m really sorry Mackie. I really wanted to see the movie with you too, but it’s just not possible right now.”
“Okay.” He said sadly and then after being silent for a while he asked, “you didn’t kill someone did you?”
“No, not at all.” But I might as well have, I thought.
“Then what did you do?” He asked.
“I really can’t say.”
“Why not?”
“Because it’s only going to make them more mad if I do. I shouldn’t even be talking to you right now, so don’t tell them, okay?” I asked.
“Okay.” He agreed reluctantly. “But you will tell me someday won’t you?”
“Yes. When you’re older.” I said. I wasn’t going to bother his eleven year old mind with things like this, because there was no way he’d fully understand. After all, he still thought girls had cooties.
“And we can go see the movie then too?” He asked.
“Absolutely.” Even it meant we’d have to wait until he was old enough to sneak out.
“Okay.” He said a little more cheerful, though I could hear he was still disappointed. “I really miss you Zaccie.”
“I miss you too kid. And I’m sorry things are so sucky at home right now, but it will get better.” I told him.
“You think?” He asked.
“Yeah. Just try to be good, okay? Mom and dad are having a hard time too.” I told him and I didn’t tell him that to defend mom and dad, but to make sure he wouldn’t get in any more trouble, which he was known to do. In a lot of ways he was a lot like me.
“I’ll try.” He said.
“Good. I have to go now though, but I’ll try to call.” I promised.
“Okay. Bye Zaccie.”
“Bye Mack.” And he hung up before I could get Jessica back on the line and thank her again.
I was somewhat surprised at how easy this conversation had been. I had expected Mack to make a much bigger deal out of it, but apparently mom and dad’s regime had already showed him how serious this fight was and that there wasn’t much I could do about it at the moment. At least my siblings understood and if mom and dad thought I would let go of them so easily they were crazy. As much as they denied it they were my family and family came first, just like they’d always taught me.
Anyway, enjoy and leave comments as usual.
title - on the other side
genre - drama/romance
pairing - Zac/OMC
point of view - Zac Hanson
rating - PG-13 (due to some bad language)
betas - I am my own beta. Any and all mistakes are my own. If you happen to tumble across any feel free to inform me so I may correct them, thank you.
info - The fear of the world kept us in, safe from the dirt and the sin and yes I'm terrified, 'cause when you’re out you know there's no return, but I love you and they're going to learn
Previous chapters:
prologue - 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10
11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20
21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30
31 - 32
[ chapter 33 ]
Before I knew it the weeks had flown by and I was on a plane back to Tulsa. It was strange to know I was going to have to spend the next three weeks without Cayden and that I wouldn’t see his parents for a good while either. I’d felt so at home there that the phrase going home didn’t really apply this time, because what home did I have to go to? There was a big difference between having a place to stay and having a home, and staying at Isaac’s definitely didn’t fall into the last category. I really appreciated it, don’t get me wrong, but I had much rather stayed with Cayden another three weeks because the weeks we had spend together had flown by far too quickly, even though we had barely done anything. Mostly we had stayed at home playing videogames, watching movies and making out -among other things. The couple of times we had gone out it had been to the mall, the cinema and to a bar once where I’d met some of Cayden’s friends.
I’d been nervous about meeting them, but I’d been especially nervous about meeting Matthew, Cayden’s first boyfriend and currently his best friend. Cayden had told me that Matthew was a little protective of him, especially after what had happened with Melvin and he wasn’t too sure how he would react to me. I couldn’t particularly blame Matthew for being protective of Cayden, I was just as protective of Kelsey and she of me, so I understood, but that didn’t make me any less nervous.
But, as usual, I shouldn’t have worried, because Matthew and I got along just fine. The start was a bit awkward and there were some rather personal questions, but as the night progressed I found myself completely at ease with all of Cayden’s friends. Most of them didn’t even seem too bothered by our sexuality although one of them would protest heavily when Cayden and I would stand too closely together, but it turned out he only did it to tease us and wasn’t actually bothered by it.
We both had a really good time and by the time we left the bar Cayden was pretty intoxicated and about one beer away from being drunk, which was fine because we had agreed I would drive back so he could drink as much as he wanted as long as he could still remember the way back home, which he did remember, sort of. The ride back took us a good half an hour longer than the ride to the bar had been, which was mostly caused by his loss of attention which resulted in him telling me to turn after and not before the turn was coming up. If this had been anyone other than Cayden I would have probably been annoyed, but this was Cayden and he was just too cute to be frustrated at with the way he was staring out the window, lips curled into a smile while humming random songs.
He was even cuter the next morning. Hung over and all he wouldn’t let me go out of the bed and every time I attempted to, because I sort of needed to pee, he’d pull me back to him and hold me even tighter while burying his face in my neck a bit more and mumbling something about sleeping and staying in bed all day. I would have gladly stayed in bed with him all day but eventually my natural urges took over and I could finally persuade him to let me go long enough to pee and make some coffee and breakfast. We did spend much of the rest of that day in bed because he was being a baby about getting up. I was pretty sure that the hang-over he was having wasn’t any worse than the hang-over he’d had while we were on tour, but the advantage of being home was that you could just stay in bed all day and take advantage of your sober boyfriend when it came to food and cuddling. I’m sure he would have just gotten up and taken his self induced hang-over like a man if I had told him to, but the truth was that I didn’t mind cuddling with him and spoiling him for a change. All along the tour he’d been there for me when things had gotten hard, now it was his turn to be treated to a day of being looked after. Besides, there wasn’t much that topped spending the day in bed with your boyfriend.
I couldn’t keep a smile from creeping up my lips as I thought back of all the amazing moments spend with him and before I knew it the plane touched ground and I hadn’t felt nervous about crashing once, which was a first. I grabbed my carry-on bag and stepped off the plane as soon as the doors opened. I easily made my way through the airport I knew so well and collected my bags at the conveyer belt before walking to the place I had said to meet Kelsey who was skipping her last class to be able to pick me up. She looked beautiful, all smiles, and I wrapped her tightly in my arms, lifting her off the ground in the process. She really was as light as a feather, especially compared to Cayden. She laughed and playfully smacked my chest before hugging me tightly once again.
“You look a lot better.” She said with a pleased smile as she studied my face.
“I told you I was feeling a lot better.”
“I know, but I like to see it with my own two eyes.”
“Only ‘cause I’m so fine and you can’t keep your eyes of me anyway.” I teased.
She gasped and I grinned ducking just in time to avoid being hit in the head with her purse. She glared at me, but a laugh soon spilled from her lips too.
“You just never change, do you?” She asked, shaking her head in mock disappointment.
“Never.” I agreed and took both my suitcase and rolled them in the direction of the exit. She fell into step besides me and guided me back to her car where we ditched the suitcases on the backseats because Kelsey didn’t have much of a trunk. We settled in our seats and she turned on the radio as she drove off the parking lot.
“Is it weird to come back?” She asked after we’d driven in silence for a while.
“Yeah. Usually when you come home you have something familiar to come back to, you know, and now everything is just messed up.”
“Some things do stay the same though.” She said looking at me and I smiled back at her, knowing she meant our friendship.
“Thankfully. I wouldn’t know what to do without you.” I admitted, because in a lot of ways she was still my rock, having Cayden hadn’t really changed that. Of course I could share everything with him too, but there was just something about sharing things with Kelsey that I needed too. Our friendship ran too deep for us to easily replace the other with someone else.
She took my hand and squeezed it softly. “I’m always here.” She said.
“I know you are and that means the world to me.”
“You’d do the same for me.”
“In less than a heartbeat.” I agreed and she smiled, squeezing my hand once more before letting go to shift gears.
I saw a lot more of Kelsey over the next two weeks to catch up on some quality best friend time in between getting ready for the tour. We only had one week left and as usual we were far from ready. Flights and hotels still needed to be confirmed, our equipment needed to be packed and at the same time we were trying to get back in our rhythm when it came to playing together because it had been a while and after a couple of weeks of barely playing a bunch of flaws always crept in and they needed to be straightened out. In between all that we were also trying to spend some much needed time with our friends and family, which was why I was on my way to my parents’ house. They hadn’t invited me. In fact, I still hadn’t talked to them and going by what Isaac had told me I wouldn’t anytime soon if I was going to wait for them to contact me, but I wasn’t on my way there to talk (or fight) with them per se. Long before all of this had gotten so awkward I had promised Mack we’d go see the new James Bond together before our tour would continue and I planned to keep that promise. Mack liked the movies as much as I did and we always watched them together whenever they were on TV. So, I had said I’d take him to see it at the cinema as soon as a new one came out, which had been the case a couple of days ago.
I wasn’t exactly looking forward to seeing my parents again after what had happened between us the last time I’d seen them, but I was here for Mack and not for them so I pushed the nerves and feelings of unease away as well as I could and rang the doorbell.
As I had expected it was my mother who opened the door with a polite smile on her face which faded in an instant when she saw it was me. “What are you doing here?” She asked hostile and it hurt, but I was determined not to let her get to me. I was here for Mack I reminded myself.
“I came to see Mack. I promised him we’d go see the new James Bond together.” I said as normally as I could.
“Ah yes. He mentioned that, but we decided that Walker will take him.” She said and this hurt even more, because it was the first time she’d ever called dad by name in front of me. Usually she would have said your father.
I swallowed away the lump in my throat before trusting myself to speak again. “I promised him that I would take him.” I said again. “Dad doesn’t understand the movies in the least.”
She glared at me for using the word dad, but I wasn’t going to budge. As stupid as they may be acting about the whole thing they were still my parents and for me that would never change.
“Maybe you should have thought of that before you got involved with that nonsense of yours. He’s not going with you and that’s final. I don’t need you to fill his head with your idiocy.” She said with a tone that was so calm it was disturbing.
“I only want to take my little brother to go see a movie. I promise I won’t say a word about my idiocy.” I mocked.
“It’s still not happening. I don’t want you anywhere near this family again, unless you come to your sense and get some help. Goodbye Zachary.” And then she shut the door in my face.
I stared at the door in shock for a good couple of seconds before I came back to my senses and rang the doorbell again, and again when no one answered. Again it seemed like no one was going to answer and I was in the process of inwardly scolding myself for forgetting to bring my key when my mom opened the door again with a frustrated look on her face.
“What?” She demanded.
“He’s my brother. You have no right to tell me I can’t hang out with him. If he doesn’t want to hang out with me anymore, then fine, I’ll accept that, but you don’t have to make that decision for him. All I want to do is take him to the movies like I have promised him. If you don’t want him to know I’m gay–” she recoiled at the word. “–then I won’t say a word about it. Just, please, let my take my brother to the movies.” I pleaded.
“As far as I’m concerned we’re no longer your family and that includes Mackenzie.”
“That’s bullshit.” I objected.
“You made your choice to leave Zac. You can’t expect your actions not to have any consequences. This is one of them and you’ll just have to learn to live with them.” She said still eerily calm. “Now, if you’d be so kind to leave I have other things to tend to.”
I glared at her and didn’t move an inch. “He’s my brother.” I insisted.
“No, he was your brother. You left.”
“You didn’t give me a choice.”
“We did.” She replied.
“Not really.” I said.
“Well, that’s what you think.”
I huffed and we both stood there in silence for a while, neither of us giving in.
“Look, we can keep standing here all day, but you’re not going to see Mackenzie. It’s as simple as that, so you might as well leave.” I didn’t doubt she meant it when I saw the look in her eyes, so I sighed and gave in. I had no other option. Of course I could force my way in, but that would only piss her off more and on top of that I was scared she would somehow punish Mack for it and that was the last thing I wanted. I was sure he already had enough to deal with.
“Fine.” I said unhappily. “But at least tell him that I dropped by and that I didn’t forget about it.”
“Sure.” She said and I instantly didn’t believe it, but instead of making a fuss about it I simply turned and left in defeat. It wasn’t worth the fight. I’d just call him later and explain as much as possible and hope that he wouldn’t hate me.
I drove back to Isaac’s place with pain and disappointment flowing through my mind. I still couldn’t believe they had actually banned me out of their lives; that they wouldn’t even allow me to see my siblings. I guess I shouldn’t have been this surprised, because I knew from Isaac and Taylor that my parents were still unhappy with them for continuing to hang out with me and that they hated that they couldn’t make them do otherwise because Isaac and Taylor were both adults and it seemed to make them twice as determined to keep the younger kids from following their lead. I’d known this, but I suppose a part of me had still hoped that it wouldn’t actually be this bad.
I dropped my keys on the cabinet and shrugged out of my coat as soon as I was inside. I was relieved to find Isaac gone. I didn’t particularly feel like reciting and reliving what had just happened. Instead I made some hot chocolate and plopped on the couch to watch some lame and mind numbing cartoons to fill the time. Isaac was still gone by the time it was time for dinner so I made myself some Mac and Cheese and settled back in front of the TV.
Around seven-thirty I felt I had waited long enough and fished my phone from my pocket to call Jessica. She answered on the third ring with a tired hello.
“Hello to you too. Everything okay?” I asked.
“Zac!” She exclaimed in surprise. “Yeah, fine. Just my English homework kicking my butt.”
“Same old same old huh?” I teased lightly.
“Yeah.” She said with a sigh, she was still distracted.
“I was actually calling to talk to Mack. Is there any chance you can get him on the phone without mom or dad finding out? I don’t want to get you guys in trouble for talking to me.”
“Is this about the movie? He’s been going on about it ever since it came out. He keeps saying you promised to take him and mom and dad keep saying that you probably forgot about it by now and that dad will take him instead.” She said.
“I suppose mom didn’t tell him that I dropped by today and that she wouldn’t let me see him?” I questioned.
“No, she surely forgot to mention that. But I think Mack is in his room so it should be no problem to talk to him.”
“Thanks Jess. I really appreciate it.”
“No problem. Hang on.” She said and then all I heard was a lot of moving around.
“Zac!” Came Mack’s loud enthusiastic voice after a while, immediately followed by Jessica scolding him for making so much noise.
“Hey kid.” I told him with a smile.
“Please tell me you’re still going to take me to the movies because I really really really don’t want to go with dad.” My heart sank a good inch and I had to swallow before I could reply.
“I’m sorry Mack, but they won’t let me take you.” I told him.
“Because of what you and mom and dad are fighting about?” He asked.
“Yeah. I’m really sorry Mackie. I really wanted to see the movie with you too, but it’s just not possible right now.”
“Okay.” He said sadly and then after being silent for a while he asked, “you didn’t kill someone did you?”
“No, not at all.” But I might as well have, I thought.
“Then what did you do?” He asked.
“I really can’t say.”
“Why not?”
“Because it’s only going to make them more mad if I do. I shouldn’t even be talking to you right now, so don’t tell them, okay?” I asked.
“Okay.” He agreed reluctantly. “But you will tell me someday won’t you?”
“Yes. When you’re older.” I said. I wasn’t going to bother his eleven year old mind with things like this, because there was no way he’d fully understand. After all, he still thought girls had cooties.
“And we can go see the movie then too?” He asked.
“Absolutely.” Even it meant we’d have to wait until he was old enough to sneak out.
“Okay.” He said a little more cheerful, though I could hear he was still disappointed. “I really miss you Zaccie.”
“I miss you too kid. And I’m sorry things are so sucky at home right now, but it will get better.” I told him.
“You think?” He asked.
“Yeah. Just try to be good, okay? Mom and dad are having a hard time too.” I told him and I didn’t tell him that to defend mom and dad, but to make sure he wouldn’t get in any more trouble, which he was known to do. In a lot of ways he was a lot like me.
“I’ll try.” He said.
“Good. I have to go now though, but I’ll try to call.” I promised.
“Okay. Bye Zaccie.”
“Bye Mack.” And he hung up before I could get Jessica back on the line and thank her again.
I was somewhat surprised at how easy this conversation had been. I had expected Mack to make a much bigger deal out of it, but apparently mom and dad’s regime had already showed him how serious this fight was and that there wasn’t much I could do about it at the moment. At least my siblings understood and if mom and dad thought I would let go of them so easily they were crazy. As much as they denied it they were my family and family came first, just like they’d always taught me.
mood: sickish
music: breaking up - eskimo joe
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